Monday, October 31, 2011

Rhyme or Reason

Such a good day!...well better anyways. Today I went to work, came home from work...and did nothing. And you know?...It's okay.

Last night I talked to a really good friend for an hour. I was soo overwhelmed with the idea that I had no plan of action with my life. And you know?...that's okay sometimes. It's okay not to know. I have an idea of a plan...and I would love to pursue it.
I want to coach lacrosse, and I want to  work and live up at Redfish Lake in central Idaho.
Both are very plausible. I am very anxious to know if I am able to do so, because I already know I am capable, and highly knowledgeable in both areas. Lacrosse. and Redfish.

I know my faith is being tested right now. and i recognize Satan is beating at my door harder than ever. I know i have a very important role in this life. I am ready to change. I want to succeed. I know I can do anything that is pleasing to God. I can have the spirit as a constant companion in this life if i have faith and a prayerful relationship with heavenly father.

I am so blessed to have pain and hardship...that i may have the opportunity to learn and grow from mistakes...also that i have the opportunity to actively use the atonement of my savior Jesus Christ.

Everyone has rhyme or reason.
people come into our lives for a purpose.
they never come early and they never come late.

I am grateful for ALL my life's adventures, and I am still young!! I am excited to know what's in store for me next!

Friday, October 28, 2011

reaction to action

It's true...things happen to us that we can control! Maybe a bad day at work. Maybe getting blown off. Possibly getting forced into an argument that you really don't care about. Losing a loved one, or torn relationships. Tragedy surrounds us, and sometimes it is out of our control. Our Reaction to these actions however, is in our control.

So, You had a bad day at the office did ya. Just remember the only thing that matters is your efforts. give all you can and work efficiently. still have problems? well its not your fault, so you shouldn't have to worry about. our reaction to unfortunate events is what people see as our character. good reactions = good character. bad reactions = bad character. at least in the work field. soo just smile and wave, and put a good show on if you're having a bad day.

Have you ever been blown off on any occasion? I have! It kinda sucks. ALOT. But! much as it might suck to be stuck in that sort of situation, think of your reaction, before you take action. alot of the time we just want to tear into the one who blew us off because they really hurt us...but you have to the ask the question "why?" why did they do that? always consider things from every angle! you don't know what kinda of day they were having..or what they might have gotten roped into at the last second. maybe some tragedy struck them ey?. the best thing to do is find out whats up and then react accordingly. it'll show that you are one heck of a friend. and if they don't see that...that's when you can rip into them. even though you should love everyone and forgive and forget...

Losing a loved one...every one's gotta die at some point, and eventually it will hit home. Every one's grieving processes is different. I know from experience that the best way to get through the grieving process is to be there for your other loved ones. and do not isolate yourself. isolation never solves anything. unless you're a crazy person...then yeah, it would a bit.

LOVE SUCKS. unless you're are happily married than congrats you've found true-love. unfortunately there is breaks up and divorce...and its not gonna go away. Just recently I went through a pretty big split. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. There was lots of history. We both knew it was time to end it. neither of us were happy and we couldn't continue like that. he was soo kind about the break up. and then he went on facebook and commented about how he was soo stoked to be single. and he forgot how much he loved being single. what is up with that? his reaction was kinda crappy. and it tore me apart. but then i have to think...what is this kid going through, that he wants to inflict this kind of emotional pain on me? we have been together for soo long and he said he didn't regret any of it and that it would take FOREVER for him to get over me...really buddy? sounded like you got over me pretty quick. My sister made a good comment to me the other night. "he probably is hurting right now, and he still cares about your feelings and he wants you to hurt like he is...he is probably just wanting a reaction from you."...
Long story short. take the high road in the relationship. because the higher you are, the better your partner will be, because you are looking now for something higher, bigger, and better

Quentin L Cook spoke in general conference on this very topic. Tragedy. to summarize that all up...
while we don't know why, we do know there is a plan.

...It is difficult just looking through the lens of mortal life. If we are insightful, and faithful we will receive great blessings. Many of us will go through sever trials.

1. heavenly father loves us
2. the atonement makes everything right
3. there is eternal life, and there will be reunions with those we have lost, and have gone on before us

Monday, October 24, 2011

fall cabin trip 2011

Oct 20th

What an Adventure, we finally made it to the cabin. It took a couple hours longer but we finally made it. I'm so glad I am up here. the mountains, the air...sigh its so clean and crisp. LOVE IT. even though this is a work trip, I think it's the best vacation ever.

Oct. 21st

I'm going to be sore in the morning! today we did lots of work! well we did 1 very hard job. FIREWOOD. we needed to restalk our piles of logs. so we went up 4th of july creek to find fallen timber. it was my brother Dan, my dad, and I. we found some good timber so we cut up a few hugh pines in 6 ft logs, then loaded them up. and boy were they heavy! I say about 125 lbs each if not more. it took all my strength to load those beast up. we ended up making 2 trips, with 2 big loads of logs. Tomorrow we're boing to finish up the pathe from the front of the cabin to the side. I pray that I might I have strenghth for tomorrow...because I will be hurting.

I haven't gone out to meditate yet this trip. I would really like the opportunity to get away by myself for a moment while we are up here. Gods beauty sorruonds me. I would love the opportunity to draw near to him. I wish I knew my purpose here. and I why my thoughts always go to my brother Phillip who has past away and who I have never met. I'm not crazy to want to know him and constantly think about I?

I have so many unanswered questions about myself. I guess thats why I am getting a patriarchal blessing in a week. I should go to bed....I gots work to do in the mornin'!

Oct 22nd

...In less than 24 hours I'll be back home. This trip as gone by so fast! probably because we worked so hard. I had the opportunity to have a couple moments alone. nothing too great. but I did spend time with my brother and nephew. Family 1st right? they are the most important thing life.

There are things I struggle with, some days are harder than others. I have truely been trying. I pray heavenly father knows. there is improvement that needs to be done however...I know he loves me with a perfect love. I matter to him.

We are never done bettering ourselves. I love the cabin and the stillness. It reminds me that we are everything in the eyes of god. Dieter F Uchtdorf spoke on that in general conference, the title of his talk is "You matter to him". In the talk he reminded us that "the man", is nothing. what is man? we are the reason god created the universes. We are everything to God. we have a spark of eternal power. Life is only a small moment. there will always be conflict. Satan appeals to the pride of men. He also works through discouragement. Never get discouraged on your progress! What matters to God is that  we are doing the best we can. Spend your life doing good. You matter to him.

believe in him. do whats right.

Monday, October 17, 2011

away from the "world's world"

I know a place where I can go, and I'll find love and peace.
 and I know I am safe from the world

Where family and friends surround me.
And there is no question what is important in life.

The family cabin
The home away from home

Surrounded by Heavenly fathers masterpieces,
I know that I am loved by him.

by the cabins are amazing lakes where you can
clear your mind, and feel at peace.
the weight of the world is getting heavier and heavier...
that's why we need an outlet.

small and simple things, makes for a great life

I love the cabins, the mountains, the lakes, and of course the family. It's refreshing to get out of the world's world, and step into heavenly fathers world every once and awhile.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011


I just read the talk given by Jose L Alsonso during General Conference. Boy it was a good one, it got me thinking about how I am doing helping me fellow men. I just wanted to summarize his talk, because it was just sooo good!

Happiness is found through following Christ. Jesus is the ultimate example of service. We all have opportunities to serve. Many ask, what can we do to help? when is the right time? Jose L Alsonso simple stated, SIMPLY ACT. people don't care what we do, all they need is our determination. To know what to do and who to serve, pray to heavenly father for preparation. The Saviors love is for all! But he never forgets the "one". The Lord expects our devotion.

I really needed that talk at that moment. I've been getting too caught up in myself, and things for me that my attitude as been really crappy. I know that when we are serving, we are the happiest. I'm going to make it my goal to think less of me this week and more on others.

"Do the Right thing, At the right time, without delay!"

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

song of the heart

You know how there's always a song that hits home? A song that really gets down in your soul? I got mine.

Monday, October 3, 2011

my simple prayer

Tonight I kneel beside my bed
Asking for thy loving care
For thy arms to be around me
As I stuggle through my prayers.

A young woman striving for excellence
But not seeming to get very far
Is sitting here alone tonight
Just trying to figure out her heart.

Heavenly father, where am I going?
And where will I end up?
I need thee more than ever
To carry me in thy arms of love.

At times all I see is darkness
Those times I am not sure where to turn
I end up down here on my knees
And once again I feel that return.

And when that light fades a little
I'll come to you once more.
And know with a second thought
That you'll always be the cure.